This is my first Tuesday home with E in quite some time. I mentioned in my first post that I had been working part-time, then took a leap of faith on a business opportunity that ultimately fell through, and now am officially back at home the majority of the time.
Well, it was just last Tuesday that I drove to to the office for the last time, to tell my business partners I was quitting. I tend to be a "play it safe" kind of gal anyway, so this whole experience of taking such a risk and failing was especially humbling for me -- as was saving face afterwards, when everyone I know, who was so excited and proud of me when they found out I was joining this partnership, excitedly ask me how things are going, and I have to tell them that it didn't work out. I suppose if it had to happen, at least it was now and not years from now, when me quitting would have been significantly more complicated.
But I digress.
All of that to say, I am thrilled to now have more "Mommy and Me" time with E. I had terrible guilt about quitting my old job to work part-time, specifically to have more time with her, and then running off to start this new venture which caused me to spend even less time with her than I had before.
So now that we have more time together, I keep thinking of more and more fun things I want to do with E before the summer ends:
- play outside more
- take more photos, of her and with her
- have a playdate with our friends
- go to the zoo
- go to the park more
- read more books
That may seem like a silly list, but I just don't want to take any of these moments for granted. I am so thankful to have this time with her. I had wanted to be a stay-at-home mom from the time I knew I was pregnant, but unfortunately we just couldn't make it work. I know lots of families use daycare/babysitters and love it, but it just killed me to leave her all day, every day, and really only get quality time with her on the weekends.
Of course, we still have the kind of bond that only a mother and baby can have -- I am the one she wants when she is tired, sick, or hurt -- but I hated that for 10-12 hours per day, someone else was filling that role for her. I love being able to just BE with her, and to watch her learn and grow and experience new things. I love watching her little personality develop, and to observe the little person she is becoming!
And with that, I'm going to walk away from the computer, and go spend some quality time with my sweet girl. :-) Happy Tuesday!